Frozen in Thought
I have been a virgin all my life but I couldn't anymore. The only thing in my thoughts now was to look for a man that will deflower me. I was tired and done with virginity. I wanted to also feel like a woman. These were the thoughts going on in my mind. After all I have been practising virginity all these years with nothing to show for. All my mates were married both virgins and non virgins so what was the essence of keeping something that would not last after the wedding night. ...and of course I was not the only person holding onto this belief ,a lot of folks have told me this. Virginity ends after the wedding night. So what is the big deal.
Florence! Florence !! Florence !!! My Mother called me for the upteenth time. I couldn't answer because I was lost in thought. After the third time, I sluggishly went to answer my spiritually inclined Mother and pastor of Heaven Rules Bible Church. I was the pastor's daughter, so I dare not misbehave, I was seen as the lead example for the youth and upcoming youth. In the church ,I supervised the youth being the overall youth president and choir director, I recently dropped my position as the prayer warrior coordinator If not I would be holding three strategic positions alongside the evangelism monitoring team superintendent.
My late father, pastor Moses during his lifetime would always advise me to lead by example so as not to bring shame to my family. I was keeping my virginity because I was taught by my Mother to fear God and stay away from premarital sex till marriage. My mother married as a virgin so why shouldn't I , I wondered while growing up but now a lot has changed ,my father was no more ,he had passed away after a protracted illness and mother was left alone to overseer the church. I did the little I could to help but I wouldn't know if my little wasn't enough as no brother approached me for a serious relationship. The few who came all left me after finding out I was a virgin and not ready to break even. They accepted to marry me only on the condition that I agreed to premarital sex as away to prove my commitment to the relationship.
I was caught in the web of either breaking free from the tenet of sexual Purity and abstinence or yield to the tenet of consensual sex ,that is sex before marriage.
This time around brother Joshua was in the picture ,a vibrant ,rich and handsome young man in his early 40s. I was in my mid 30s so having a man at this age wasn't a problem to me at all coupled with his other attributes and qualities,I was ready to walk the aisle with brother Joshua. In fact I once told myself ,If anyone was going to hinder my marriage to him ,It was going to be him alone; that is brother Joshua alone. Brother Joshua was the tenth person coming to ask my hand in marriage from another church. But he too wanted sex just like the previous ones,funny enough I liked him more than the rest. He was the only one who caught my fancy coupled with my present age , I decided to wrap it up with brother Joshua
He was only asking for sex,I reassured myself as I headed towards his three storey building located a few metres away from my father's house. He had asked me to pay him a visit to which I consented to, I took a few things including my hand bag and a change of clothes because I hoped to pass the night at his place.
Arriving at his house ,I was stunned at the beautiful interior decor of his house. As he showed me round ,I discovered the house had five master bedrooms up floor and three bedrooms down floor with a well acoustic kitchen and adequately furnished sitting room with 25 inches plasma television hung at the right hand corner of the wall facing the entrance door. It was a beauty to behold
I quietly told myself that this was going to be my last bust top ,the search for a compatible life partner has to end with brother Joshua. He was stupendously rich. The cars I saw outside spoke volumes of his wealth coupled with his edifice
But something was off about him,his kitchen was obviously looking more like a married man's kitchen,it had all the comfort and convenience provided for in a well defined marriage especially one whose wife is homely and particular about cooking and general well being of her immediate family and children.
I waved it aside as I tried to assure myself that no such thing was going to happen. I gave myself the confidence that Joshua wasn't married. If he was, he wouldn't have brought me over to his house,beside there was obviously no woman or children in the house. I spent one week with him as against the one night I had planned to stay and certainly according to my speculation he was not married, he didn't make or receive suspicious calls from any woman. He received all his calls in my presence and even allowed me access to his phone.
In fact brother Joshua treated me like a queen and hid nothing from me. He told me the password to his phone without hesitation and throughout the one week,I had patiently waited for a call or text from another woman but none of these happened.
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Florence! Florence !! Florence !!! My Mother called me for the upteenth time. I couldn't answer because I was lost in thought. After the third time, I sluggishly went to answer my spiritually inclined Mother and pastor of Heaven Rules Bible Church. I was the pastor's daughter, so I dare not misbehave, I was seen as the lead example for the youth and upcoming youth. In the church ,I supervised the youth being the overall youth president and choir director, I recently dropped my position as the prayer warrior coordinator If not I would be holding three strategic positions alongside the evangelism monitoring team superintendent.
My late father, pastor Moses during his lifetime would always advise me to lead by example so as not to bring shame to my family. I was keeping my virginity because I was taught by my Mother to fear God and stay away from premarital sex till marriage. My mother married as a virgin so why shouldn't I , I wondered while growing up but now a lot has changed ,my father was no more ,he had passed away after a protracted illness and mother was left alone to overseer the church. I did the little I could to help but I wouldn't know if my little wasn't enough as no brother approached me for a serious relationship. The few who came all left me after finding out I was a virgin and not ready to break even. They accepted to marry me only on the condition that I agreed to premarital sex as away to prove my commitment to the relationship.
I was caught in the web of either breaking free from the tenet of sexual Purity and abstinence or yield to the tenet of consensual sex ,that is sex before marriage.
This time around brother Joshua was in the picture ,a vibrant ,rich and handsome young man in his early 40s. I was in my mid 30s so having a man at this age wasn't a problem to me at all coupled with his other attributes and qualities,I was ready to walk the aisle with brother Joshua. In fact I once told myself ,If anyone was going to hinder my marriage to him ,It was going to be him alone; that is brother Joshua alone. Brother Joshua was the tenth person coming to ask my hand in marriage from another church. But he too wanted sex just like the previous ones,funny enough I liked him more than the rest. He was the only one who caught my fancy coupled with my present age , I decided to wrap it up with brother Joshua
He was only asking for sex,I reassured myself as I headed towards his three storey building located a few metres away from my father's house. He had asked me to pay him a visit to which I consented to, I took a few things including my hand bag and a change of clothes because I hoped to pass the night at his place.
Arriving at his house ,I was stunned at the beautiful interior decor of his house. As he showed me round ,I discovered the house had five master bedrooms up floor and three bedrooms down floor with a well acoustic kitchen and adequately furnished sitting room with 25 inches plasma television hung at the right hand corner of the wall facing the entrance door. It was a beauty to behold
I quietly told myself that this was going to be my last bust top ,the search for a compatible life partner has to end with brother Joshua. He was stupendously rich. The cars I saw outside spoke volumes of his wealth coupled with his edifice
But something was off about him,his kitchen was obviously looking more like a married man's kitchen,it had all the comfort and convenience provided for in a well defined marriage especially one whose wife is homely and particular about cooking and general well being of her immediate family and children.
I waved it aside as I tried to assure myself that no such thing was going to happen. I gave myself the confidence that Joshua wasn't married. If he was, he wouldn't have brought me over to his house,beside there was obviously no woman or children in the house. I spent one week with him as against the one night I had planned to stay and certainly according to my speculation he was not married, he didn't make or receive suspicious calls from any woman. He received all his calls in my presence and even allowed me access to his phone.
In fact brother Joshua treated me like a queen and hid nothing from me. He told me the password to his phone without hesitation and throughout the one week,I had patiently waited for a call or text from another woman but none of these happened.
Table of contents
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